Women are amazing. Truly, we are incredible creatures and we accomplish some truly amazing things. This is why I’m so tired of getting asked the following questions – they are limiting, superficial and frankly if we are striving for equality we don’t have the f*cking time. Here are five questions I wish women would stop asking each other.
Number One: “Is that your real hair color?”
I’ll never forget when a woman, who I knew didn’t like me, asked me this in front of 20+ of my co-workers. In the immediate moment I went bright red, partly out of embarrassment, but mostly from pure rage. So it had been a few extra weeks since I saw Lexi, my stylist – lady get off my back. It’s petty and childish. Also is it rarely ever someone’s natural color? Let’s consider this as taboo as asking someones weight and move on.
Number Two: “Does this outfit make me look fat?”
I’ll admit, I’m guilty of this one more times than I’d like to count. But here’s the thing – even if you do look fat, do you expect anyone to give you an honest answer? You’re asking because you feel insecure and need to be validated, when instead you should be telling yourself you are killing that outfit, societal standards be damned! As one of my favorite women once told me, “my body is a gift to this world” – don’t you ever forget it.
Number Three: “Am I prettier than his/her ex?”
I absolutely HATE this question. Why should we compare ourselves to someone a person is no longer interested in? Maybe you are, maybe you aren’t, but FFS who cares?? They aren’t together anymore, and they obviously like you so what is the problem? We need to stop letting society tell us that women are in competition with each other and accept that she may be beautiful, but so are you.
Number Four: “Can you believe what she’s wearing?”
Honestly, it’s childish that you think I give a f*ck what another woman decided to put on that day. Why should I care? Let’s let women express themselves without making them feel like they owe the world an explanation. Clothes are clothes, and we already get enough sh*t from men and the media. I’ll wear sweatpants and a hoodie to a gala if I want to Rebecca, and there’s nothing you can do or say that will make me change my mind – thank you.
Number Five: “Should I dump him/her?”
In my experience, if someone asks me this question then they already know the answer is yes. And I’ll likely roll my eyes at you because you know I’ll tell you yes. Strong women don’t question their instincts, and if you have to question whether you should be with someone, the answer is likely no. There are 7 billion people in this world and counting, go find someone else that gives you better orgasms and farts less in bed.
Honestly, we women are above questions like these, especially at a time when our rights are at stake. Instead of focusing on appearances and whether or not a person likes us, let’s work on liking ourselves and making sure our civil liberties stay in tact. And no, that outfit doesn’t make you look fat, I promise.
Author: Kayla Olson
Email: [email protected]
Author Bio: Kayla is a 25-year-old who moved to Stockholm, Sweden this year and enjoys playing Uno in new places. Having a hard time sitting still, she picks up and moves often. If you’re Tinder Bio says that “you like traveling and working out” you’ll get a left swipe for being unoriginal, and she doesn’t give a f*ck if you like her or not. Her parents like her plenty.
