I waited
with baited breath and a heart that weighed more than it should
pumped full of promises you never intended to keep I found it difficult to breathe
Lungs filled with unspoken soliloquies, a chest congested with consonants unable to form the proper words my tongue longed to buy a vowel
O- a sound that’s used to elicit excitement but now is synonymous with disappointment
U- never fit the size of your potential even though I thought I could have it tailored
I- believed in us more than you did
Oui
Never learned to stand because you didn’t give us the chance so I just sat here waiting, debating, contemplating
I even tried to measure my worth against that of others and that’s when the scale broke
I weighed the ash of which you reduced me to, watered with the tears that I cried instead of the Phoenix who rose from it in spite of heartbreak, Still I Rise
That’s the resilience of my type but they no longer make my edition
Courage to stay open to love even if it doesn’t reciprocate my feelings
Yes, you broke me and in these shards you’ll wonder where my secret lies, how I still allow a smile to dance across my lips until it pirouettes in my eyes
I stand up straight
hips swaying as I walk to the door
no brakes
your gaze rides my curves and for a brief second I want to undo my restraints and crash right into you
But the beauty in letting me go isn’t the pain that I feel, it’s in knowing you can’t replicate authenticity and what I gave you was real
So while you may find temporary satisfaction she’ll never be me
I am
A phenomenal woman
Phenomenally
Phenomenal woman
That’s me.
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