My grandfather had been in the nursing home for a while. I had visited him once in the nursing home while he was suffering from dementia. Nobody wanted to call it what it was, I think, because it scared them. But he was forgetting who people were sometimes, and it was the ailment that took his mother.
They told me he had good days and bad days, to brace myself because we didn’t know what to expect the last time I visited him.
He actually remembered who I was, he hugged me, telling me had a dream about me. When he greeted me, he asked me if he could borrow a billion dollars. I couldn’t help but laugh. He later revealed to me that he had a dream that I made billions off my books, and I could thumb my nose at anyone that he pleased. So, his comment when he first greeted me made a bit more sense.
He always believed I would accomplish my dreams and make it big in writing as I have always wished.
While it was nice to see him on what seemed to be a good day, he seemed confused about where he was. He kept asking us questions. Who was the hand of the girl he used to hold hands with on his way to school? Where was the new store? Where did the bees go?
We tried to keep him calm and answer him the best we could.
Then he turned to us and asked, “Have I come to this place to die?” I blinked back tears at his question. It broke my heart to hear how helpless he sounded. I knew I had to be strong, though, for his sake so I held back the waters threatening to break over the dam of my eyes.
Two days after Christmas last year, he passed away.
Whilst I am excited for Christmas this year, I am also a little worried that this year is going to be hard on everyone. It will be the first Christmas without grandpa. I miss his jokes, his laughter, his pranks, and his stories.
I do have one small solace, though, perhaps the bee keeper has been reunited with his bees. Perhaps, he now is roaming heaven telling jokes to the angels and spending time with his dog A.J. Life is full of ups and downs, and whilst I look forward to Christmas – I have a feeling this year will be bittersweet.
