Home. Home is the place where you feel most comfortable. Home is the place after a long day of work you go to relax. Home is your safe place.
For me, that was all true until I was sexually assaulted by my roommate.
It’s only been a few days, and my situation could have been so much worse, but I still feel uncomfortable in my own home. After graduating from college and moving hours away from home, with no family and very few friends in the area this is not what I needed. I come home from work every day and go straight to my room. I wake up eat breakfast in my room, watch tv in my room, then at the end of the night I eat my dinner and go to bed in my room.
It’s not fair that he wins, it’s not fair he can comfortably make food, watch tv, take a shower, and sleep but I can’t. Falling asleep with a baseball bat next to your bed at about 3 am because you keep hearing noises is not the life I want to live. Living in the basement at least makes me feel secure knowing there are two floors between us at night, but knowing that I don’t have a bedroom door and he could freely walk in my room whenever creeps me out.
It’s just not fair, not fair at all that I live in fear of him and he knows it. It’s not fair that he can say those things, and make me feel that way. It’s not fair that his girlfriend has no idea about any of it. It’s just not fair.
The fact that I have spent hours crying over this and he has been able to live his life just like another normal person isn’t fair. The fact that I want to go to the police to report it but am too afraid of the aftermath is unfair.
Fuck You for making me feel this way! Fuck You for making me feel uncomfortable in my own home. Fuck You for taking my safe place and security away from me.
I hope one day you realize how disgusting of a person you are, but unfortunately, that will never probably never happen. That’s just life.
If you like this article, check out: https://stories.harnessmagazine.com/a-feeling-of-home/
